I am Kori
by The Mage of the Star
Summary: Toshiro goes rouge abandoning his Captain position and leaves the soul society without a word, while his past and who he really is forces him into the world of the living were he is forced to make an impossible choice that well change him forever. Back in the soul society however trouble is brewing when a new enemy comes forth who plans on destroying them unless they give him Kori
1. Chapter 1

Chapter one: Questioning and a new possible enemy

It was an end to a typical day at the soul society and squad ten was being to finish up for the day. Its Captain was of course in his office doing his usual work; when the Lieutenant came busting in.

"Hay Captain are you in here" Rangiku asked.

"Yes Rangiku, can I help you with something" said Toshiro.

Rangiku pouted her lips and put her hands on her hips.

"I can't believe you, what in hells name made you think that I would be perfect for this mission in the world of the living. You know I'm not good at research and scouting" she wined.

"And that's why I'm spending you, I thought that it would do you some good; besides we don't have anyone else available for the mission." Said Toshiro ignoring his Lieutenants protests.

"Ok, ok, it's not like I had anything else planed for the week" she mumbled.

Toshiro stopped working on his paper work and looked up at her and neat his brow at her.

"Is that so, and just what is so important that you would decide not do you job as a soul repaper" He asked.

Rangiku stopped this time and blinked at him in supersized.

"Captain that's not what I meant, and you know it" she said.

"Then quit complaining and get your work done. I noticed you still haven't even touched your paperwork" his voice rising as he said it.

Rangiku clenched her fists "You just don't get it do you?" she yelled.

"Get what" he yelled back as he got up from his desk.

"Never mind you wouldn't understand your just a guy" said Rangiku. "I'll be ready for the mission bright and early tomorrow morning Captain". Then she turned and left without waiting for him to responded.

Toshiro just stood there not sure what to say, and then confusion started to creep into the young Captains mind.

" _What does she mean I'm just a guy. I'm not a guy; I'm a… wait who am I''_ Toshiro shock his head.

"Oi, Toshiro you don't have time to be worrying about this" he said out loud.

Going back to his desk to finish up his paperwork, when his hell butterfly few into the room and hovered over him. It made its noise and sparkled to let him know that someone was trying to contact him; seeing that it was from the head Captain he answered it.

"Captain Hitsugaya here, what's going on?"

"All Captains are to report for an emergency Captains meeting" said the Lieutenant of Squad one.

"I'll be there as soon as I can" he said.

Then the butterfly left and Toshiro head for the squad one bunkers. By the time that he got there most of the Captains had already there. Taking is place among his fellow Captains he noticed that they were chatting amongst themselves.

" _I wonder what this meeting is about. It seems that no one knows what's going on."_ He thought.

Then just as he finished his thought the head Captain came in and called the meeting to order. The head Captain told them about the sudden change in los Noches that they seemed to be preparing for war and how they had gain so much power in less then 24- hours. As he said this all the Captains were in shock.

"But how can that be, we defected Aizen. There's no way that Los Noches could gain so much power without him" said Jushiro.

"That may be, but according to scanners and the data I've collected Los Noches is preparing for an all-out war" said Captain Kurotsuchi.

"Well it seems that we have a new enemy to defect then" said Toshiro.

"Yes, it appears that way" said Captain Unohana.

The head Captain gave orders for Captain shinji, Captain Kurotsuchi, and Captain Zaraki to go to Los Noches to figure out what was going on. While the rest of the Captains were to stay here and prepare for battle incase this enemy came here.

The Captains nodded in agreement and then went out to care those orders.

Toshiro sighed as he walked out of squad one, it seemed that peace had finally come to the soul society but now they were at war again and this time there would be no Ichigo to bail them out this time either.

"Hay Captain Hitsugaya, you alright you seem a little bit more girly then usual. Do you need me to toughen you up?" Said Captain Zaraki.

Toshiro stopped in his tracks and turned to face Captain Zaraki.

" _More girly than usual, what the hell does he mean by that."_ He thought as rage filled him.

"What was that Captain Zaraki, I'm not sure if I heard you correctly" said Toshiro trying to keep his temper under control.

"by the way Captain Zaraki it doesn't matter what gender you are you still can be tuff." Said Captain unhanora cutting in.

"That's fine, I just noticed that the little Captain was more girly. I mean it's practically written on his face and how he cares himself and you all can figure out the rest" said Zaraki.

Toshiro's rage left as soon as it came, he didn't know what to react to what Zorkie had said.

" _Is what Zaraki said true. I'm a guy right aren't I. I not sure if I know anymore"_ he thought.

Blinking away the confusion he spoke up and "Captain Zaraki if you have a problem with how I act you can take it up with me. But leave the rest of the soul society out of it".

"Captain Hitsugaya is right and we shouldn't be bickering amongst are self we need to be preparing for war in case we have a new enemy." Said Shinji.

The other Captains mumbled in agreement and counited on their way, leaving Toshiro, Zaraki, Unohana, shin by themselves.

Zoike let out a grunt and then walked away without another world. Then Shinn nodded a walked off fallowing Zorkie.

"Captain Hitsugaya if you ever need someone to talk to about your gender or anything; your always welcome to talk to me. "said Unohana smiling with that Momma bear smile that she usually had.

"Thank you Captain Unohana, I will take that under consideration." Said Toshiro.

The walk back to the squad was quit after that and Toshiro was emotionally drained after all that and by now Rangiku had proubly heard what was going on by now.

" _I should probably go and talk to Rangiku and apologize for earlier"_ he thought.

He sighed and put his chest with his arms out on his desk, felling sad and confused. Then out of the conner of his eyes he saw a small letter address to him.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter two The Letter

Toshiro sat up from his desk and went to be the letter was. Picking it up he looked at the letter then he turned it in his hands, trying to find out who it was for Seeing that it was the letter that he had in his hands was the one that Granny had said that he had with him when she had found him as a baby outside in the middle of nowhere in the frozen landscape of the soul society outside of Rukongai. She said that she didn't feel right opening it since it was with him, so she figured that it was meant for him. Toshiro never opened the letter after all these years even long after he had become a Shinigami and a Captain. Now that it was here out of nowhere he figured that now would be the right time to open it.

 _Dear Yuki,_

 _I wanted to write to you, now that you're gone and have moved on to your next life. I would have never imagined I would end up as a single Mother taking care of a small little girl. I won't have changed it for the world though, you were my joy, Yuki and I loved you more than anything. From the first moment that I laded eyes on you when you were born, I knew that you were something special. Besides the obvious sliver hair and turquoise eyes off course. I must admit that you were a bit of a handful through all though most girls your age is._

 _Life was never easy for you and me since we moved a lot and the friends that you did make never seemed to last for very long. The ones that did though they took you for all that your worth and then some. I'll never understand why you always stood by Ryo Sato, no matter how many times he took you for granted. I tried to get you to leave him one day but when you told me that you loved him. I lost the heart to do so if there was one thing that I've learned is that we don't choose whom we fall in love with._

 _Anyway, oh where was I, that's right the reason that I wanted to write you this letter. Sorry dear, it's easy for your Mother to get sidetracked when she's talking about you. I wanted to tell the accident was not your fault and that it was mine and Takeo's fault we should have been paying attention to the road and not arguing with our self's. I've also dumped him; you were right he was nothing but trouble. I found out that he was nothing but a lying, cheating jerk that didn't even really want to be with me and just using me for well let's just say my girlish charms._

 _I won't keep you for long since you probably want to get on with that new life of yours. I just want to tell you that I hope you have a wonderful life filled with love and happiness. That you find someone that will love you for who you are and have many wonderful friends. That you'll do something that will make you happy and not worry about the paycheck. Finally, I wanted to tell that I will always love you and that my life was forever made better because of you. Good Luck in your new life._

 _Love,_

 _Your Mom_

Toshiro closed the letter and put it back in the envelope, not sure what to make of it. He wasn't sure if the letter was for him or that it was even from his own mother in the world of the living. It could be it some else's letter that anciently got into his blanket along with him when Granny found him in the middle of nowhere when he was a baby. As he tried to short threw the new information that was put in front of him. The confusion that he had felt earlier had crept back upon him.

" _What if the letter was for me and, I am actually a girl. That I just told my mom that was one and she accepted it, it could be the reason why she says my little girl and the way that she describes her. It's exactly like me. But It can't be though I'm not Yuki and I'm a boy, not a girl. (I think). What do I do?"_ Thought Tōshirō.

He bit his lip trying to keep from worrying and fear from coming forth as his thoughts began to spiral out of control.

" Come on Toshiro it's probably just a letter that got into my hands by mistake from another mother who had just lost her daughter, but it doesn't explain what caused the girls death though" he muttered quietly to himself.

Not noticing that Rangiku running back into the office in a hurry.

she had forgotten the gift that she had wanted to give to Shuihi since his birthday was next week and she wanted to tell him how she felt about him.

Noting her Captain, she stopped in the middle of the doorway in shock in what she was seeing.

Seeing her Captain standing in front of his desk on the verge of tears while his hands tightly grasped a small letter almost to the point of a fist.

She knew that it was like him to be emotional about things even when they were personal to him and he had always said that it was childish to do so.

"What's wrong with me, I shouldn't feel like this "he murdered as tears started to fall from his face.

"Captain, what's wrong." She ran to him forgetting her shock at his out bust realizing that it was more important to help him.

He blinked at surprise as he saw her running toward him while robbing his eyes trying to see better.

Rangiku rapped her arms around him as he finished as she tried to quit him.

"I'm fine Rangiku, now let me go." He yelled as he forced himself out of her arms.

"Then why were you crying" She yelled back.

I'm not and It's not any of your concern if I am or not." He said as his voice grew even louder.

"Not any of my concern Captain, really your going to play that card I know darn well that you don't cry over nothing. "Rangiku yelled back.

Toshiro didn't respond but looked away as a bit of his sadness came back on his face.

"Rangiku, look I'm not ready to talk about it all right. I'm sorry I shouldn't have yelled at you." He said still not looking at her.

Rangiku sighed "All right, just promise me that you'll talk to me when you need to ok?"

"Yeah." he said keeping his eyes from hers.

Rangiku sighed and crossed her arms at his response.

"Well, good night Captain see you in the morning." She said as she walked over to her desk and opened the bottom dower and pulled out a small gift. Then put it in her pocket.

Toshiro watched her as she did this, seeing the small smile come on her face as she picked it up.

"What's that?" he asked quietly.

"Oh, it's a gift for Shulii for his birthday next week." she said.

"So that's the reason why you wanted to stay here and not go on the mission in the world of the living. You wanted to spend time with Shuli because he's important to you." He said as his voice continued to get quilter.

"Yes Captain, he has this new friend that is throwing him a surprise party. I believe he said that his name was Ryo Sato.

Toshiro blinked at the name " Wait did you say the name Ryo Sato?" in surprise.

" Yeah, why do you know that name?" asked Rangiku.

" Um … well… I" said Toshiro.

He wasn't sure how to answer Rangiku's question without telling her about the letter which he wasn't even actually sure that it was for him anyway let alone his strange feeling that he was this Yuki person.

" Well?" asked Rangiku

" No, I just heard his name somewhere." He said.

" Oh, I see. Well I'm out Captain and I'll be here at 8 am sharp for my mission tomorrow" she said and turned to walk out.

" So, you're going to go see Shuihi right now correct?" he asked slowly.

" Yes, I'm going to go see him now, why you ask?" said Rangiku.

" I was thinking about going with you if you were because I want to ask him about Ryo." said Toshiro his voice growing quilt again.

" Yeah I would assume so since the two have been busy hanging out together a lot lately." said Rangiku.

" Oh, ok then, let's go then." Said Toshiro his voice still quiet.

He wanted to meet Ryo and ask him about the letter and figure out more about Yuki and give back the letter even if it was his past life.

" Yup, they should be in the squad 4 common area they like to sit and chat there." said Rangiku.

Toshiro just nodded and started to head to squad 4 without saying anything to her about the matter.

Rangiku sighed not sure about what to make of her Captains strange behavior. She had heard about what had happened earlier with the other Captains at the meeting and their argument and then finding him to the point of tears with a letter in his hands while being interested in Ryo at the same time.

" _I wonder what's going on with him, he's never this emotional about anything and wouldn't care about what the other Captains thought of him. As well that letter that he was holding tightly earlier while trying not to cry, it must have been important to him if he was on to the verge of tears but why though_?" She thought but then she shook her head at her own thoughts.

The two walked in quiet until they got to squad four and sure, enough Ryo and Shuihi were in the squad 4 common room chatting away with each other like best friends.

" Hey guys, I brought Captain along with me today. I hope that's not a problem." Said Rangiku.

" Nope not a problem." said Shuihi smiling as he saw Rangiku.

Toshiro came up slowly not sure what to expect since he didn't know Ryo and he hadn't always gotten along with Shuihi.

Ryo got up from his set and walked off to Rangiku but stopped when he saw Toshiro.

" Toshiro is that you ?" he asked in surprise.

Toshiro stopped and looked up at Ryo, he was tall with short blonde hair and hazel eyes wearing the traditional Shinigami clothes but with a necklace made of wooden beads. However, he seemed to be familiar to him and an old sense of da'vu came over him.

" Ryo." said Toshiro muttered not remembering how to speak.

Rangiku laughed at the awkward silence that was between them, " I thought that you didn't know each other".

" Rangiku over here" Shuihi coughed.

She did what Shuihi asked of her, " But why ?" she asked.

" Ryo's apart of the royal guard so he has his memories of his past life and he was telling me about a girl that matches Toshiro's distribution perfectly. So, I'm thinking that they might have known each other in their past life" said Shuihi.

Rangiku nodded things where starting to make sense to her now about why Toshiro seemed to know of Ryo without actually knowing him at least, but she wasn't so sure about what Shuihi was saying about the past life thing.

" Toshiro, it's me Ryo, we grew up together in the world of the living remember we were friends." said Ryo.

Toshiro didn't say anything but he backed up and shook his head as if in disbelief of what he was hearing.

All three of them looked at the young Captain in confusion.

Rangiku started to worry since he had never in all the years that she had known him she had never since him act like this even when she told him about his spiritual pressure and about his Grandmother.

" Captain are you, all right ?" she asked.

But it seemed like the young soul reaper didn't hear her and continued to act the way that he did.

Shuihi had seemed to get the fact that this wasn't normal for the young Captain and started to try and talk him down as Rangiku was doing.

But Toshiro just flashed stepped out of squad 4 not listening to them and their concerns.

He continued to run past all the squads of the gotei 13, out to Rukongai straight to his Grandmother's house.

Stopping he fell to his knees out of breath, " So it is true, I am Yuki that girl from the letter" he said.

Then a laugh came out of the side of the house and Toshiro looked up to see who was laughing.

Toshiro stopped and turned his head and to his surprise Yhwach was walking towards him and smirking while laughing at his misery.


End file.
